Its difficult to understand but one thing can be obvious. When you keep all the hatred in you and all you have is hatred, it will be difficult to turn back.In my observation, it is very difficult to be objective when emotions run high. I guess that is why the prophet Muhammad encourages one to think of 99 good reasons before dwelling on a negative one. Once negativity takes over then it will always be wrong and unacceptable.
How do you get out of a catch-22 situation? It will always be expected that one party to blow things out of proportion and the other either to respond or retaliate in the same manner. I have seen how things can get out of hand when one retaliates similarly. It is interesting to note the psychology when one reacts not to the other party's expectations, what would the response be? eg.. an argument starts with one party yelling to the other. Commonly the other would yell back perhaps in a more commanding manner. The domino effect would be retaliation upon retaliation.Thats how it should be isn't it? Ok.. now the opposite happens, one party tries to dominate the other and himself guarded upon the next step of retaliation. However the other party decides not to provoke and not retaliate hence just silence.haha interesting isn't it.. and the one who started the fracass kept yelling without an expected response of the other. I am sure the objective of what it was supposed to be will be skewed and the yelling party would start to provoke in order to stimulate response.
What happen next? Silence is golden and of course, the party with the expectation would be unsatisfied and provoking response ala "Michaevelli" hahaha
Sun Tzu is smart.. he mentioned many times about the art of being wise..
“The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting.”
“Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.”
“To know your Enemy, you must become your Enemy.”
“Thus we may know that there are five essentials for victory:
1 He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.
2 He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.
3 He will win whose army is animated by the same spirit throughout all its ranks.
4 He will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared.
5 He will win who has military capacity and is not interfered with by the sovereign.”
1 He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.
2 He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.
3 He will win whose army is animated by the same spirit throughout all its ranks.
4 He will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared.
5 He will win who has military capacity and is not interfered with by the sovereign.”
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