Sunday, November 12, 2017

Write up burnout

The most obvious reason for my sudden appearance in the blogging world today is obvious: my TV malfunctioned. This is the bad thing about LED TVs, the backlight can just decide to stop working and you become a blind TV watcher. Well, this problem has been going on for few months but because it went Ok after few days of not switching it on. Haha thats how easy going i am. I know i should have it repaired as it is still on warranty. but MALAS.. 

Honestly, since working in the south; my creative mind had deceived me. I am not keen at all to be in front of my laptop screen and type whatever is in my mind. Its difficult for me to lay out any story line and write it up. I used to have it free flowing, an all nighter for one story. Thats how my mind works. Unfortunately, i cant reproduce that at the moment. Hence my off time even from blogging. To say that im superbusy is not totally true. I was busier before ; looking back at my blogging history since 2004, I produce lots of my writings during the busy years of my masters programme. 

I believe I'm suffering from a Writing block burnout. I was thinking about writing stories for our future DIAgnosis or even my future solo book. BUT I CANT!! Haha memang kering otak to write :)

I have one book which is done but i have to make it longer because it is too short. (Not too short like HIPNOTIS). I really need to work at it because i believe there is a story to be shared with everyone. I foresee it to be liked by the mass readers but need lots of fine tuning to it. Haha.. Hopefully 2018 will be the year it can be published. 

The test to this will be after I've repaired my TV. Haaa.. then we'll see whether the exodus will be repeated.

Insha-Allah, the whole family will be going for an umrah trip soon. I am looking forward to refresh my iman. Honestly, it had gone downhill since last hajj and perhaps this visit will rekindle the light to maintain the aim for jannah.

Whatever happened to time?

Yes... time moved swiftly without us realizing it. It goes on and on. Memang betul la surah al asr. Sesunnguhnya manusia dalam kerugian. By not appreciating time, memang kerugian.

I don't know why I;'ve stopped blogging since March. Too busy? Thought block? And suddenly there is a vacuum in this blog between then and today. Its already November. It will be one year now in Medini since I was unexpectedly expedited to move. I wish i had the motivation then, as there were a number of exciting things that happened. 

Life has been plentiful. There were a number of clinical achievements unlocked. I am enjoying my time here with my work. It is such pleasure to work in not so pressured working environment. Of course politics is difficult to separate wherever you go. I do hope that this time around it will be different, life free from politicking and looking for favours to survive. Being with a fairly green and foreign administrators can be challenging. But then again, how can life be perfect? There is no such thing. It is us who would decide to make it perfect to our own liking. 

I summitted Elbrus end of August Alhamdulillah! It was a superb achievement as there were a number of luck factor that was with us. Lets plan for the future of which to climb :)

However, I am not 100% settled here as we are still in the grey of having the whole clan move south. Being settled in KL, I can understand why it will not be easy to start over. I am lucky that my line of job allowed me to do so. I can only thank Allah for his rizq and be thankful everytime.

Happy Birthday GMH :)
 Birthday celebrations and Cardiac Services launch
 Our Annual Dinner last night :)

Friday, May 05, 2017

Historical March 2017 - Tale of two specialties

Alhamdulillah, March has been very kind to us. We have crossed boundaries and leaps towards our brand namesake. I am very happy to have been involved in these two milestones that we have achieved here in Medini. Bearing the name Gleneagles, this is what we can comfortably fulfill our potential. It is not an easy feat but I guess when we do it for patient's sake, god will help us achieve it ho help more people. 

Honestly, I am blessed to have dedicated and enthusiastic people to work with. I know what they want to achieve therefore that is my role as the team player. I may not bear the glorious end as the surgeon in charge, but as the anaesthetist who ensures what feels impossible to be a reality

Awake Craniotomy

When i was approached by my neurosurgeon about the possibility of doing it, I told myself Why not? By principle it is a simple thing to do. Its the precaution and anticipation that will make a difference whether it becomes successful or you have to abandon the initial plan.

The challenge for me was for the awake-awake-awake procedure! Wow, thats an uphill task but of course not impossible.

Important VIP points:

1. Patient must be counselled properly and understand every detail of the procedure. They must be fully motivated for this procedure.
2.Regional anaesthesia skill for the scalp block. This must be superly perfect.
3.If patient throws a fit during the procedure, there must be a solid plan for airway protection.

I did my research by lookingthrough the literature and case reports written by colleagues in Malaysia. MOst of them were more comfortable with sleep-awake-sleep method so i suppose what I was going to do is pioneer "ish". I was lucky as the surgeon adopted a position which was convenient for possible problems if it arises.

Alhamdulillah, the good teamwork with had made this procedure successful with good outcome.


This was the marker of a tertiary hospital. It has always been its KPI since the start and after 1 year and 3 months, i present to you CABG.

The preparation was immense. 80% of my OT staff had never seen one before. We had a thorough preparation from the nurses to the PCAs. What i value most was their eagerness to learn and cross that boundary. My surgeons are both renowned in CTS and certainly the 2 Cardiothoracic surgeons that you want to work with.

When the day came it was goosebumps all over. I started UiTM's first and now its Gleneagles Medini. The profile of our first patient honestly may not be the typical first case you want to operate on. But then again, with cardiologists being more daring than before, one cannot expect CABG cases now without a challenge.

Alhammdulillah again, it went smooth and well.

And till date,  we have done 3.

Image may contain: 15 people, people smiling, people standing and hat


HAd an interesting chat with an old friend yesterday. We discussed the importance of keeping a journal for future reference. Hence, blog. A very important pieces of writings that will be preserved forever. (Unless bankcrupt la)

I will cherish this picture forever, taken before the opening ceremony of the Annual Scientific Congress Malaysian Society of Anaesthesiologists and College of Anaesthesiologists Malaysia 2017 in Berjaya Waterfront, Johor Bahru.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Getting prepared for the big day

We are getting prepared for our big day. Our first open heart surgery very-very soon. This i suppose will be the landmark of how my current centre will be. We have currently doing great things with the neuro team and now the cardiac team is set to go.
 The OT staff themselves are excited but at the same time having palpitations. Its not something trivial as the preparation must be perfect. This reminds me of the time when we prepared for our first case in UiTM. It was nerve wrecking preparing for the day. Its not just the equipment and number of staff, it is also the mindset of the whole team. One thing for sure is once this gets started, there will be no turning back! 

Its not just the OT, but the ICU staffs are gearing up themselves for the start. They've been working hard these past few months because of the neuro cases we have been handling. I must say they did really well to cope with all that. Now another frontier is beckoning. 
Alhamdulillah, i must say the team we have is a good one. Both surgeon's are of recommended reputation. I have an experienced perfusionist and at the same time, enthusiastic nurses who are ready for any challenge any day! 
Lets do it!! Bismillah..

Friday, March 17, 2017


Yes! By today it can be bought at the nearest MPH stores!

The latest in our series! However, this was more to explore our fictional creativity side.

Enjoy the stories yea.. but be WARNED!

Crawling back into the scene 2017

Wow.. how time flies! Totally neglected this blog! The longest hiatus I've been in. Well, it has been very busy sorting out lots of things here. The move, the relocation, the job, the responsibility!
Haha.. but seriously! my last post was in December and now its March. A good 3 months before I feel like i need to blog again! 

It had been a hectic 3 months and things a falling into place. I was literally thrown into this new responsibility down south and had been working hard to organize things amidst the busy OT list. Alhamdulillah, i 've managed to secure my partners in crime and in time, i will be freely blogging again without hesitation. 
I am blessed with a group of dedicated staff in the OT and enjoying every single moment. At least that part of my stress was never an issue. The cases we do here are variable, I have definitely upskilled my paediatrics and neonatal anaesthesia as we have a very active paediatric surgeon in this hospital. The variety of cases we have at times can be complex! Being a tertiary centre that was the challenge i have to take. Nak sangat, haa amik kau.. hahaha

Alhamdulillah, we are doing hi-fi neuro cases ( which i will blog about later) and coming soon is the cardiothoracic cases. I'm sure the numbers will increase with time. With my colleagues set to join me soon, Im sure I'll be able to find time for recreational activities. Even now, I'm back keen with badminton as there are a number of staff who are keen enthusiast.

I cannot promise but I will try to make 2017 a merry year with more post than 2016! 

Sunday, December 11, 2016

Fist of fury

It was a mixed emotions November contributing a my busy and mobile December. Remember what i blogged about late October? Yup, me making the decision to move from where I am quite comfortable in. I proceeded with the process and yes, i have decided to make the move to the south. It was not easy considering that I am very settled with my job and home. Bukit Jelutong is definitely home as we've been there since 2008. I have tendered my resignation in October and was looking at serving my notice till end of December.

Then an unexpected turn of event happened. Unfortunately, my future partner Dr Imran aka Vijay passed away! It was so sudden! It was shocking to the whole of anaesthetic fraternity! I was supposed to join him as the second anaesthetist in the centre and now he was gone! 

It was crazy in dealing with the uncertainty. Imagine having a big number of cases and the only anaesthetist you had collapsed and they were without anyone! I was divided between leaving Rawang in that lurch and help in where I will be in. It was not easy as i guess you can never know the future. Burning the bridge now means point of no return. I had to make the decision to keep with my earlier pledge. However, i needed to negotiate with my current CEO to see how they can assist me. 

Alhamdulillah, we managed to reach an understanding. My replacement was ready to take over my place but he could not be in Rawang all the time in December. That was good enough for me. And so goes the hectic arrangement and agreements between many parties in the month of November. Obviously, I could not blog anything out as it was not my priority. Imagine juggling that and planning for the coming ASC in JB come April! Gila! Yes, I am the Scientific Chair and so far it has been an assortment of thoughts! 

God is great. So far i managed. And now to the second week of December, when everybody is having their holidays I am constantly oncall wherever I am. But I thank Allah for making things easy for me so far, Insha Allah..

Friday, December 09, 2016

CUCMS talk HAnds 2.0

For the second time in a row, I would like to thank CUCMS for inviting me for their activity last week. It was a pleasure to be chosen as one of their speakers. I was with cif of MedTweet.My , Khairul Hafidz and a famous medical student Wazir Aiman. Thus, i was the old one on the stage hahaha
 As this was to collect fund for their humanitarian project in Nepal next year, the theme of the talk was about volunteerism and the actto follow. I shared my experience being the ground zero team in Nepal 2014. I can't help it to make jokes as I talk..Luckily it was in tune and the audience laughed and enjoyed the session. 
Thank you again CUCMS, Perhaps in 2017 they will invite me agian to make it a hattrick appearance!

The farewell (again)

It was sweet of the staff to have a small farewell for me. It was held in Tasik Biru Kundang and I did not expect it to be as grand as how they made it to be. It was a nice place to have dinner at andthe price per head is very reasonable. Im sure i'll come agin here for an outing some other time. Totally, i was smitten and i guess they do appreciate me as a working colleague for the past two years.
 It was a fun night ans we ha a galore of food and entertainment. The highlight was the everybody gets a lucky draw and it was funny that we had to rush to give everybody the prizes!
 My gratitude to all the OT team for all their hardwork. Sister Wani, Ayu, Siti, Puva, Rubi, Pani, Mas, Husna, Nadia, Ika, Tengku, Arif, Abang Radzi, and the rest Feqah, Daus, Hakim, and therest. It was my pleasure to work with you guys. I would like to apologize for any of my wrong doings especially my temper at times.
Frankly i don't knw why Im leavingthem as the working environment is very condusive! It is sad that i have to leave. Thank you again. And may we all met again in the future, wherever that will be.

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

The clock is yours

Alhamdulillah, my journey so far has been blessed. The time has come again for me to make another turn in my life. Honestly, i am settled. There is no reason for me to go anywhere. However, opportunity made its presence and as I am about to embark the next stage of my life (being 40), i have to take the challenge.. again! 
Sometimes i ponder, adakah aku ini hambamu yang tidak bersyukur? But then again i am aware that if we have something to offer, then we should go all the way to fulfill that. Moving to a new place is a definitely significant life event. A lot of adjustments need to be done. Not just for me, most importantly the kids and their future. So far Alhamdulillah, it looks promising.
What does my future hold? insha Allah, usaha tetap usaha.