Gaza Mission Part Deux: Team 1

Team 1 consist of 7 team members. We were formed as part of the WHO-EMT SCT (Surgical Cell Team). We were supposed to be a team who can function as an OT team wherever we are being sent. It was a very general TOR because that was the only information given and expected of us. Where, How and When we would not know and we had to depend on the previous teams notes and experience while they were in Gaza. We were definitely not clear about our specific role and assignment. 

Let me introduced you to the group. We were divided into 2 groups for our flight into Cairo. There was always the possibility that any of us denied for entry especially if we go in a big group. Group of 4 or 3 seems less suspicious. We were not supposed to reveal our real purpose going into Cairo etc.

Together with me on my flight was Kak Zah, S/N Yati and Pak Hafiz. I've met Pak Hafiz and Yati before in the previous mission to Nepal in 2015. Pak Hafiz was in team 1 as well and it was certainly a story then with him! Yati came later after we/ve started our field hospital. It was glad to see the old faces. Yati currently works as a clinical nurse in IMU and she deals with academics more. I knew from Mercy Malaysia's posts that she has been an active volunteer going for various missions. 

Kak Zah is probably the eldest volunteer Mercy Malaysia has had ever. She is in her 70s and seemed to bevery committed to the mission. She is a very experienced midwife and worked in hospital management admin during her last few years of service. She was certainly very energetic and having that kind of positive energy with us was important. During this flight she was supposed to be my auntie and we were in Cairo as tourists! We actually rehearsed this a few times in case we were being queried by the Egyptian immigration. We certainly had our laughs as often she would suddenly answer tangentially during our mock interviews.

 Kamarul Haqq - orthopaedic trauma ulung was in the other team. I have blogged about him before and again it was such a nice feeling when were introduced during the online taaruf. Dr Al-Amin - a senior surgeon who had been to Gaza many years before was in the team as well. I got to know him better afterwards during the mission.

 https://mafeitz.blogspot.com/2014/08/gaza-mission-chronicles-from-volunteer.html 

And of course the team leader was Pak Azam, Mercy Malaysia's main man over the years. I first met him in Ormoc, Philippines for the Thyphoon Yolanda response. He was a very calm and learned man; the best person to lead this mission by far. I have learnt a lot from him and gathered my experience of disaster response and humanitarian work thus far. 

Myself? The anaesthetist of the team and all of us together will be known as Team 1 MM. 

 We were very nervous of course - because we knew we could be asked to turn back at anytime during this trip. Alhamdulillah, it was a breeze in Cairo airport. There was a bit of a worrying moment when Kak Zah was asked to wait in front of the imiigration officer. She kept smiling and giggling and that made Pak Hafiz uncomfortable. It happened that there was a scanning issue of her passport and she was let through without any issues later. 

Here we were in Cairo, all seemed busy and typical. 

The Gaza Mission Part Deux: Leaving on a jet plane

Everything was kept under wraps because of two reasons. The first was it wasn't sanctioned by the government of Malaysia, Two because it is not confirmed until we step inside the real soil Gaza! It was that uncertain. But things were certainly moving really fast. Once our names were given the thumbs up by Gaza, then the tons of paperwork that had to be done by Masniza ( our Mercy Malaysia coordinator for this mission to WHO/UN and whatever agencies that needs to be. 

 

We had our online meetings done a few times with the initial date of entering Gaza was supposed to be the 1st week of February - but we got rejected and had to reapply for the next date. Whilst doing all this, nobody knew I was going except for the group. Eka and my parents had no clue about this at all. Totally zilch.  

Then the date was approved, we were scheduled to fly from KL on the 17th of February, Saturday morning. The first person I informed was Qayyum which was on the Wednesday. I went to PASUM to meet him up; it was then that I informed him that he had the honour to know it first. it was in ZUS cafe UM that I explained it was possible that I may not return and I am preparing him for that. I told him he will have to lead the family when I left. He was speechless because of course he did not expect this at all. Knowing at the same time the chaos in Gaza through the social media. I saw tears in his eyes as there was with me too. I left with him the necessary instructions of what to do if he received bad news about me; my account bank number and all the contact persons involved. 

 

Later I met Azad and informed him as well. He is my most trusted person in my life hence I gave him the honor to help sort things out if something did not go right with this mission. These were the only people who knew about this, even my parents were not notified of this departure. I'm sure they will know later once I am there. 

 

Telling my wife Eka was not easy. I totally did not know what to expect but I was fully prepared for the anger that she may project knowing how very last minute I told her. Eusoff just turned 1 and we were just recovering from organizing the massive party we had.  I was prepared for her to react negatively towards my intention of going to Gaza. What was my logic doing this? Well.. kalau last minit nak marah pun sekejap je kena endure and by then I''m off away.. haha 

 

To my upmost surprise, she reacted very rational. Too calm yet accepting stragiht away. Yes she cried but not because of anger; because she knew that I really wanted to do this. This was in fact my dream to step into Gaza as I;ve told her many times about my failed attempt in 2014. She knew I was being my usual self as a humanitarian to serve and to my surprise, she was in fact HAPPY for me! She even apologixed to me because she was angry with me not planning to attend Marissa's birthday do because I could not tell her I was not going to be around! She was truly sincere and very lovingly supportive hence this is the story about how I told my wife.. 2 days before leaving for Gaza. 

Qayyum made a point that he said he wanted to send me at the airport. In the early morning of the 17th February 2024 we made our way to KLIA. Guess in which car? Yes.. the trusted steed of Perdana V6 101 because I did not trust Qayyum to drive my car haha It was certainly a wobbly drive and I do still remember how panicky Qayyum was negotiating the driveway in the KLIA parking. 

Old Virgin post

Amazingly this is my first post for 2025. haha Every year without fail I will tell myself Ok, I will be active again blogging. And everytime it fails miserably! I do wonder how did I find time to blog in the yesteryears? Haha I am struggling to jot down the updates of what is happening around me and the development of all my kids! It so happen that during oncall today I had a read on all of my kids arrival day. It certainly brought tears to my eyes.

To my surprise, my last post was last year when it was near my birthday? Haha like seriously I did not open my blog for the longest time. It is halfway through September 2025 today. OMG And to imagine last year I was in UK sending Qayyum off to Bristol.

Of course, what happened to Mutee certainly saddened us the whole family with his loss. I suppose only now that I look back, its only 4 of us now when all this while I was always proud that I am the eldest of five. But yeah, life is short. 

No major events so far this year. Eusoff is now happily attending his nursery and certainly lots of changes can be seen (for the better or worse?) He is the typical toddler who you read and appear in FYPs of one/s social media. I do at times smile when thinking about his antiques. His obsession with dinosaur is certainly the happening thing for him now.  

Qaisya is now happily in CFFS UIA in Gambang. Well it was her 2nd choice. She did well in her SPM and of course Im super proud of her. She has her issues but I suppose she has to deal with it growing into adulthood. Marissa is also doing well in school and perhaps a bit of scare in her fourth form introduced to the reality of SPM. She did mention that she is interested to do medicine haha but lets see how far will stick with that.

Mizan and Laikha both are in SMKBJ. Very fast indeed to see both of them grow with Mizan certainly having a physique which I wished I had when at his age. Laikha is certainly growing into a teenager and parenting them can be challenging as they are not staying with me full time.  

Stranded in Dushanbe

As I've mentioned before, we did not really know at that time whether we could exit Afghanistan. The possibility of being stranded in Khost for months was possible. Yes there was a new government but the issue was how the government operations would run was still in the unknown. Until now it is still not clear with various teething issues still unresolved. Memang kena start buat buku How to run a country after takeover 101 I suppose haha

Anyway, our exit plan was informed only 24hours before we left. Most of us would only be convinced when we are really out of the country! I have to pity my colleagues who has been stranded since 15th of August! And we arrived in Dushanbe at night on the 8th of September. Perhaps I will share later my experience when we were in Mazar-I-Sharif airport! It was really interesting haha

There we were in Dushanbe and because of the unconfirmed and unreliable possibility, we were not booked for any flight out of Dushanbe before our arrival. Flights were scarce and also full. Hence it was unly a week after that most of us were scheduled to fly back to our own countries. 1 week here? What could I do? Well to be honest, the hiking trails and countryside was tempting. In any other time I would have grabbed the opportunity to do so. Unfortunately, its covid era. Eventhough most of the people in Dushanbe claim that it is not there anymore (with their liberal stance of not making it compulsory to wear masks) I was not willing to risk that. Imagine, pergi jalan-jalan and when the PCR test taken before the date of departure, it is positive! Nightmare tu hahaha

Hence it was only in this central town that I move about until I can be a tourist guide lah haha Its a nice city as it was obvious what the Soviets did to build up its town. Large parks with beautiful fountains all around and from what I saw a thriving city in central Asia. We were lucky that when we arrived it was independence day in Dushanbe! Hence their 30th celebration and spectacular fireworks on the night! 2-3 hari cukuplah.. But 1 whole week? haha That was the start of my mental torture! But I am thankful that somehow I was given this opportunity to travel when everybody else was at home due to Covid19.

The hope

Kemana kita anak-anak Pashtun

** 90% of Afghans live below the poverty line. 

Last Day yang tak jadi

Sharing few of the pictures when I thought it was my last official day in this project. I really do appreciate the brotherhood and friendship that was offered. Certainly an eye opener and made me feeling more humble and being thankful to god for what he has given me so far.

My boyz :)

Pharmacist & PMR

The amazing cooks

FieldCo office

31 August with a different meaning in 2021

Malaysia celebrated Merdeka last Tuesday on 31st of August. Coincidentally, it was another significant date in where I am at the moment. They have had a number of significant dates being free from oppressors over the years and 31 August 2021 was the latest of their struggles and tragic history. Malaysia is indeed very lucky in her 64 years of independence that we never really had a dampering crisis that tore the country apart literally. What had happened since 2018 is too miniscule compared to Afghanistan. They have been fighting all their might in the last 40 years. The unfortunate effect is very catastrophic to their mental well being for their proud tradition and civilization.

I was supposed to leave Afghanistan too on 31st of August as planned. Though things were uncertain since the 15th (the collapse of the Afghanistan government) but the expectations of how things would be bloody and messy did not happen. This was certainly a surprise to all especially the Afghans themselves. Being on the ground with functioning working people, it has been very eye opening experience to have an insight of what common Afghans want. I can tell you that its just the same like any other individual in the world. Nobody wants war and dysregulation of the society. Nobody wants unclear future for the next generation. Nobody wants to be isolated from the world. Its about family, national pride and overall wellness. We are all humans. We are all the same with the basic tank that needs to be filled. 

So when will i be leaving this land of the Pashtuns? At the moment nobody can give me the timeline nor answers. Its a very complicated situation at the moment. Taliban 2.0 is certainly doing the steps "by the book" to make themselves legitimate and recognized by the world. A feature perhaps surprised the present global powers who are definitely suspicious of their proven past. The world then must show their compassion and maturity to uphold the principles of "real" human rights and impartiality. It is definitely interesting times ahead. But this no government situation is Afghan for the last 2 weeks is not good too! It is for this reason that I am not able to exit as planned. 

I guess the next time we say "Merdeka" in Malaysia, we really have to dive deep to ponder, do we really appreciate what "Merdeka" means. :)

We should be thankful how peaceful Malaysia is

It was not just Afghanistan news making the headlines in international news. Malaysia had her own share with the immediate news after the Afghan Taliban takeover. Our political turmoil is legendary. Since we voted in 2018, we have had 3 governments! 1 vote equals to 3 governments they say! Certainly worth it ! haha The famous Langkah Sheraton 2020 has now been takeover by deceit and treachery politics ( the way i see it) when all sides are trying to play out each other. At the end of the day I must symphatize PM tepi as again, with the downfall of TSMY - he is still not the PM.

Who would have thought, Pak Long Mail - the ever loving character that tells us about all sorts of SOP and the PKs is no the Prime Minister of Malaysia. I reckon nobody would have predicted this in a thousand years. Names like Anwar Ibrahim, Hishamuddin or KJ would be in everybody's mind but I guess its Ismail Sabri's rezeki to be the PM of Malaysia.

I guess opportunity goes to those who knocks it, right time right place. Of course it looks stupid, when after all the ruckus and political manouvers; at the end of the day the Deputy Prime Minister of the previous government ousted is now the Prime Minister of Malaysia. Macam tu je. haha

In contrast with what is happening in Afghanistan, there's no life loss or bloody tragedies. But our economy now is bleeding hence we definitely need a miracle strategy to rise from the effects of Covid pandemic which is nearing to its second year soon. 

At the end of the day, politicians are politicians. It is about power. Never about the country or idealism that they claim to uphold. It is proven so much in this power tussle from both the government and the opposition side. Sama je. I'm sure a lot of Malaysians dah menyampah and getting sick of the fiasco. However, we tend to be very forgivable too hence I do not see any possible "rakyat" revolution that will come about because of what had just happened. we are different from our neighbours. I always believe this results from the creation of majoritily middle class in our society.

Welcome DS Ismail Sabri, the 9th Prime Minister of Malaysia... but how long will he be one? 

Winds of change

Its 18 of August today. Its a different country of what it was a few days back. You know that the Taliban were going to takeover the country but nobody predicted the pace that it went. There are many factors that may contribute to this but I will not really comment on it. There are many opinions in the cyberspace on why it has happened the way it is now. 

The only thing that I can share at the moment is, in my place everything is going back to normal. Normal in the sense of the livelihood, shops are open, markets are as usual noisy, schools and universities resumed their sessions. However you can sense the caution as people are waiting what will be in store for them. The previous government of 1996-2001 comes back into mind with the restrictions and things that they did. Most Afghans had bitter memories of such. 

Perhaps what is giving hope at the moment is how the changeover of the government went. MAybe for the first time since many many years that it went peaceful. Of course there were casualties in the battles of the big cities before 15th but it is not as bloody as how it was with the latest takeovers in the past few decade. 

We had our scare 1 day after the country takeover in Kabul. The Taliban who took over the city announced in a panic mode urging everybody to go home and close the shops. The Talibs left their post and assembled in the main government offices occupied the previous day preparing to defend it. It was rumoured that maybe the city would be under attack by the special forces. There was panic in the air. People were crying and scared especially of the loved ones they left at home. It was very nervy with the continuous sound of rifle shot in the air for alarming purposes. We were into our contingency plan of worst case scenario and getting ready to occupy our saferoom.

There was more sense of all parties on the risk and benefits of such action. Multiple elders went to negotiate and brokered a peaceful outcome of this. The convoy never reached town and we were all very relieved. Me? Yup probably the first time I felt a bit tachycardic and worried. 

But What am I really worried about? Dunno really and it is interesting when I start exploring what I felt the other day. To say that I am afraid of death? not really honestly. To me its god's will and up to him of where and when it can be. Anytime really anywhere. Even in the best of securities and situation.

The press conference yesterday gave a glimpse of how Taliban reckon they would want to be perceived as. It was all about reassurance of all questions that come into mind. We can only hope for the best in this country. They have suffered enough, it is time to rebuild it properly and it needs a lot of willpower from all to unite together in this fascinating magical land. 

Another goodbye as time is due

The week before it was our HR, this week it was our PC. Caroline! She has been here for almost a year and it is time to continue life and time for her to go home. This is my first mission and I must say that she had certainly brought a lot of encouragement to ease me into this project. Of course we started off with Covid issues but all seemed to fall into place.

The current period is certainly a trying times for the country as things continue to be volatile. But the setup is very ready for any possibilities. 

We had our customary BBQ 2 weeks in a row and i suppose will be some sort of tradition to celebrate in this isolated compound in between the uncertainties. Thank you Caroline for all your hardwork and we wish you the best in the coming future :) We will definitely miss your energy!

Life comes to a halt

The one fact that everybody would agree is how this current pandemic had halted our overall plan in our lives. So many unfinished business and action for decision being delayed. We are all looking at that caption " When the pandemic ends, I would...." but as how things are looking now, it is far from over at least till the end of the year. It is frustrating that somehow whatever position we are in, we are stuck in this limbo.😌

Social interaction, travelling, family gatherings etc has way too long being abandoned. The EMCO was planned to be over by this Friday but for the Klang Valley and hard hit states, future looks gloomy. Lifting all sanctions now will only create more havoc as if it is not already now. Unless all of us comes to the decision to just let things be if it is about survival of the fittest. I believe the government themselves are overwhelmed and is hoping for the best everytime a new measure is announced with recurrent surges. Pandemic fatigue is taking its toll. We are all stuck in our own situations to plan ourselves out to move on. 

Certainly, certain decisions have to be made. It can be painful but there must be a change to the overall plan rather then hoping to sort it out after the pandemic ends.. which is not looking likely at all.

Solitude of reflection

Somehow I have a feeling that I'll be more active on my blog in this coming few weeks. I wish I can tell those reading this blog why but perhaps when I would want to say so haha But then again, sapa sangatlah yang baca blogs sekarang kan. I can only see this as my "Doogie Howser" journal for future reflections. My kids are more internet learned now due to Covid19 and it will only be time before they may find this and perhaps reading what has transpired since this blog came up when they were brought into this world. 

Its interesting that in the current unsorted Covid19 situation, we are all pushed back to reflect the meaning of our lives. Covid19 has robbed us the life that we know, it is certainly different with all the "act of terrorism" make us live in fear and uncertain.

It is bad enough that the 2021 strain is outsmarting us by targeting different profile and presents slightly different to those we had last year. We thought we have cornered it well but the narrative remains that we are still behind to get this whole nightmare awakened.

Honestly, in my whole response as a Malaysian I have tried to do my best to contribute. Not just at personal level but in my expertise capacity to help my fellow colleagues who are at the verge of burning out after 1.5 years struggling with this pandemic. At the moment, the exit strategy seemed to be the mass vaccination that would relief our healthcare system and perhaps a light at the end of this tunnel we are in. 

Saying that, we still have to wait the outcome of Euro 2020 and soon the Olympics. If the surge is under our control, then thank god we are on our way to resume the 2 year vacuum of what life is supposed to be. 

In this coming month I don't really know which part of my emotion that I will be exploring but I am sure there will be. In this chaos that I am in, time is surprisingly a surplus to appreciate.

The biggest adventure of my life

I am now in the biggest adventure of my life. I've always dreamt to do this. Always on my bucket list and this is the moment and time. Pray that all is well.

Insha Allah. 

Half year 2020

Its mid year now. Mid year 2020 !! Just like that... Wow time flies so fast and the world is still guarded with the Covid19 Pandemic that has changed a lot of ways of life.

The MCO has been lifted to another jargon of PKPP. International borders are still closed and Im sure till end of the year. Hence, it will be sometime before we can all go travel abroad.. to places where we want to explore.. 

my OT locker.. halted. 

2020.. Certainly a year and time to remember for the current generation. The real struggle and war against the unknown. 

Congratulations Menk & Reem !!

It was supposed to an epic wedding. My younger brother marrying an egyptian girl and the reception was to be held in a famous Cairo park in Egypt. The whole family was there in Cairo few days before the weddding as planned. The kids were all excited and the trip to Cairo was sort of a dream for kids in exploring the pyramids and the mummy museum.

Unfortunately the world was in crisis at the very same time. The unknown attack of a deadly virus that crippled the world slowly starting from Wuhan. In Europe the death rate of the Italians and Spanish were unbelievalble and the world did not really know how to respond. This wedding was planned months ago and in a way it was a risk that the whole entourage took. Because it was family and family comes first.

It was heartbreaking when on the same day as we arrived in Cairo, the lockdown was to happen back home. That was not too bad considering that we would just have to follow any procedures that is demanded by Malaysia. The surprising news when at that very night, Egypt announced that it will close its borders to everybody in the next 2 days! Nobody expected such announcement looking at Egypt's situation then which was not as serious as Europe. We were thinking it would be the week after. 

It certainly brought unrest to my brother who had to make the decision to get all of us back home before the closure. He asked me, and I immediately told him. EVAC. You certainly dont want to be stuck in Egypt during these times. I was here during Ramadhan years ago during their standoff with Gaza and it was not an encouraging scene. Not in Cairo.. not in Egypt!

Alhamdulillah, we managed to get the flight out after a very short stay in Cairo. But we had too. I pity Meng on his plans for the family and the wedding which had to be cancelled. It was unsafe times.

Alhamdulillah, he is married now to Reem. My doa that they will be together till Jannah and may they bring me more nephews and nieces :) 

Covid fellowship tales 3

Super throwback.. Ramadhan 1435

Subhanallah.. a year ago, i was at a different juncture. Masha Allah, only Allah can tell what was felt inside when i made the decision to let go and join the Aman Palestin team in our bid to enter Gaza at that very hostile moment. The war started on the 1st of Ramadhan and the world stood still, a live genocide happening every minute. The attempt of pushing the Palestinian out of their homeland. The whole world continued to let it happen as if it was permissible as the super powers of the world continued to let it happen. 

Its easy to preach jihad in sermons and tazkirah but when one is in that position to take up the calling, the decision was not straight forward. To really know the test that Allah gives one after all the nikmat that he has given to you? How willing are you to accept the challenge in your bid to prove your worthness to the Almighty?

 I totally cannot imagine how Prophet Ibrahim A.S. on receiving Allah's command in sacrificing his own son which he had so much wanted after a long wait to conceive, to bringthem to a totally exodus land and after that, to let him go? The ultimate test.. Alhamdulillah, as what was transpired in the quran on the ending of how all things went well. Imagine the turmoil of one own's feeling that defines us as a human being? Of course my own test cannot be compared to what Prophet Ibrahim had to endure, but perhaps only a fraction of what he felt which honestly will still make me teary everytime i think bout it.

 It was my life changer.  During this journey, I relearnt about my own faith and the concept of fi sabilillah in its true meaning. When we talk about submission, are we ready to submit.. kalbu, lisan dan perbuatan? How ready are we to know the calling is true and to believe truly to qada and qadar defying logical thinking of man? 

Subhanallah, Walhamdulillah, Wala ilahaillallah.. Allahu Akbar!

I year on and my life journey has changed tremendously. My views, my opinions and the believe on what Allah has planned for us is different from what i thought of in the past. Indeed, Allah is the planner and the challenge is always on us to keep up to what we preach.

Nepal earthquake mission - Part 4

Ittapole, Sankhu. 15km off Kathmandu. According to Wkipedia, this used to be a famous city as it was a stopping area for the famous Tibet-Kathmandu route. It was apparently the area where the former prime minister of Nepal was from and still the representative.

Sankhu was the off Katrhmandu city which was badly affected. As per NSET assessment, that was Mercy Malaysia's field hospital destination. We were off quite late in the evening. The way there was not straight forward. I was jumping up and down at the back of the lorry during the journey. It was raining that evening, it looked gloomy on our way there. 

We witnessed the destruction of the earthquake as we proceed to Sankhu. The roads were cracked, buildings which became rubbles. It was certainly a different Kathmandu from what i experienced in 2013.The current generation had never felt or experience how an earthquake would be. Imagine, the last one being 80 years ago. 

 The army truck brought us to a school compound, and the school was pink in colour! Most of the villagers who had lost their homes are taking shelter there. Our arrival was received warmly by the displaced villager,  a constant trait of the Nepalis which registered in my mind till now. We were lucky to have the Nepali army guys to help us unload, it was amazingly a lot! We managed to have the lot on the mid ground, and it was drizzling. It was superbly cold by our Malaysian standards. But not surprising, since we were at at least 1400m above sea level. 

 The people were really friendly and it helps when a number of them are able to speak in Malay as they've worked before in the country. We joined their communal dinner, as they made a point to cook for everyone who were taking shelter in the school compound. From what i can remember, at least 15 families. 

It was a cold and wet night. We were given two classrooms to fit the 7 of us. The camp beds were opened and it was more comfy than spending the night on the cement floor. I was lucky i brought my sleeping bag and my jackets. It helped a lot and i was reminded of my dreadful EBC trek trip haha At about 3am, we had an aftershock experience. Everybody was awaken by the movement it made. However according to the 5 second rule we did not need to flee from the classroom! It was amazingly scary and i cannot imagine how one would feel with a bigger magnitude shock. 

The morning was beautiful. I woke up early because the sun rose early. It was beautiful to witness the landscape of outskirts of Kathmandu. Around us were the paddy and wheat fields. We were surrounded by few building which were still standing but a short walk further revealed the utter destruction. The wrath of god. Subhanallah. Malaysia is lucky to be not disaster prone and may Allah not punish us with one in the near future.