Wednesday, October 28, 2015

One year after hijrah

It has been a year after i made the move. Alhamdulillah, it has been a fulfilling journey so far. The many things I thought it was not possible to do if one is in the private, I did it. It is possible to take leave and do charity work and of course, the journey of hajj. I guess it was my rezeki as the hospital I am now is relatively new. Therefore, the workload would not be as intense as established private sector. Despite that, the remuneration I made is sufficient and I am happy with what i am earning now. I have an understanding colleague and a healthy atmosphere with my surgical colleagues. What more do one wants kan? 
Is there any regrets? NOPE.. Insha Allah it will never be that way in fact a move forward with the hijrah. Honestly, it was never in my long term plan to join the private sector. I was a loyal servant especially to UiTM as I see great things that my faculty and University can achieve. I have always been a strong supporter and as much as possible, brought the UiTM tag with me wherever I go around the country. People knew me as the Dr from UiTM. I recruited a number of doctors and jurses to join the university. I had dreams to grow with Faculty of Medicine UiTM. We started the Cardiothoracic services and that is the highlight of my job with UiTM. A small new faculty and department but we did wonders to be able to do open heart surgeries in our humble centre, CTC. I learnt the off pump technique from a very distinguished surgeon, and i owe him the wisdom of clinical and maturity. 
So why did i leave? Soalan cepumas!! Tak puas hati dengan gaji? Problem dengan admin? Dizalimi roster? Haha Maybe few of the typical reasons of why doctors from the government decide to go private practice.Insha Allah, none of that is my reason in fact i wish i did not have to leave if it was possible. I enjoy the chaos and the rifts of emergencies that occur in government hospitals. Memang best despite when at that moment in time, we just had to do what we had to do. The environment in UiTM is condusive. Politics? well.. mana2 pun politics as that is part and parcel of life. One has to be cunning to realize one's potential. Of course, teaching the students. I miss that the most. To see the innocent young at their enthusiastic idealistic stage being nurtured into becoming complete doctors for ummah. Its a joy to see their faces as you share your knowledge with them and I do hope i would have the chance to contribute like that again in the future. 
SO what was my reason? Its our teaching hospital. The delay and frustration of the dream project for hopefuls like me really would be my reason. When i joined the faculty back in 2005, we had this vision of a medical city. An idea which inspired many others to have similar visions. I have always looked forward to the dream and motivated myself on it during my post graduate studies. It was not meant to be but we were promised our own teaching hospital circa 2015. I was really looking forward to that. Psyched my team on the dream to form our own department and unique hospital. 
Unfortunately, the project got delayed many times and the timeline moved with it. Early 2014, in a discussion with the new faculty management I found out that the project status was as how it was earlier planned. I was shocked and that made me rethink of my goals and aims.  Of course there were meetings, seminars , "FINAL" meeting etc but unfortunately it never got off to whatever reason. The VC announced regarding our teaching hospital in 2010, but as it stands now,. nothing conclusive on this project. 
My unfulfilled journey in the GAZA mission later in 2014 changed a lot of my beliefs and perception. I saw with my own eyes how weak the ummah is and how we are all gullible to the powerhouse. We can all just complain but can do nothing at all. We do not have the means to help the Gazans really. The only thing that they need and really plead if we wanna really help is to fund them. How can we fund them if we do not have the means? 
And i made my decision to part from UiTM despite my love for the institution. I still believe that the faculty and university will thrive. Perhaps not in my time and my rezeki. It will come and i guess i am the person who won't wait for things to happen. I try to make things happen! 
And here I am.. a year after. Insha Allah, prayers for better years to come in fulfilling my duties.

No comments: