Its 2pm now.. 4 hours before the team will be assembled in KLIA.In waiting, i guess better for me to start blogging about what all this is about. Insha Allah, it is something that i want to do but at the same time, i would not know whether it will be possible for me to continue blogging from today.
The world was again being showcased the brutality of the Israel regime with their unprecedented "self defense" attack towards the civilians in Gaza. This was not the first time and to note the bombings were done for the past 10 days in Ramadhan. Of course the battle for the holy land has been an outstanding issue but this act is simply non human. With the widespread of social media, it was obvious on what the west were trying to deflect and hide. The sad and tragic pictures with families losing their loved ones are certainly heart breaking.
When I-Medik and Aman Palestin circulated on the social media for the first line medical volunteer, i did not hesitate to sign up for it.What i did not expect was the whatsapp reply from the team leader, Dr Mohd Nor to me.. asking am i really sure that i want to join as then I am in. I startled and of course doubt came into the mind. It became an emotional moment for me to decide. I never expected it to be such, and with my own prayers and istikharah, i said Yes.. i am totally sure.
Again.. this is a different kind of mission. Not the charity ones that i have been involved in earlier. This is in the open fire. If Israelis have been simply bombing the city why not us? Open fire situation and i guess it took a bit of my realization what am i up to.
However, i guess it is very ironic of my previous post in me questioning, what do i really want... what am i looking for? And i guess my prayers in ramadhan has been answered with this challenge and its uncertainties.
Allah has given me lots till date, from that moment i nearly did not continue my medical studies to the opportunity i had in Perth just last year. He has given me so much and has equipped me with the knowledge and skills. These sets of skills are needed now, in the heart of all battles. Subhanallah. It is my calling. It is my duty. To perform what i do best in the war torn situation which is happening at this very moment.
This is a test of my faith, my thankfulness and how i show it to the almighty. I am at risk of meeting my death during this time but then again death is not for me to decide the timing. It is all up to him and even in the law of probability, i can die anywhere and at anytime. A simple look down on the stairs may cause me to tumble and meet my death in a shopping complex. Thus.. if it is my fate to die in my line of duty in this holy month of Ramadhan, why not? Why not? Why not? Honestly, i don't want to die any other way.
Now i have to steadfast to my niat (intentions) so that it be of pure sincerity. With the current social media role, it is overwhelming when people without stop motivating and encouraging what i have decided. And it is this spirit which have brought all of us together. Subhanallah.
If the internet is a possibility, i do hope to continue my daily chronicles of the happenings at ground zero.Insha Allah my dear brothers and sisters.
Du;a for Palestin.Du'a for Gaza.